for the rest for the summer. (Pg. 70-71) Knowing this, she thought it to be okay if she were to have an affair also. On a date with Constantin, he invites her to his room, but to her dismay, nothing happens. Once the stay at the hotel is over, Esther returns home to Boston, home to more disappointments. The air punched out of my stomach. All through June the writing course stretched before me like a bright, safe bridge over the dull gulf of the summer. Now I saw it totter and dissolve... (Pg. 114) During this time, Buddy Willard is in a hospital treating patients with TB. Esther discovers that Buddy is falling in love with a nurse there, and continues with her own life in Boston. Insomnia begins to grow upon Esther, and her mother refers her to a psychiatrist. The doctor concludes that Esther suffers a severe state of depression, and is tells her that electroshock therapy is needed. Later in the story, it reveals that the first few treatments she received actually causes her restlessness. Because of these bad therapy sessions, Esther goes through many attempts at suicide, none successful. A major cause of her depression is revealed. I thought that if my father hadnt died, he would have taught me all about insects, which was his specialty at the university. (Pg. 165) She then finds her fathers grave and couldnt understand why I was crying so hard. (Pg. 167) After more suicide attempts, she is taken to a mental institution. Even there, she still thinks of suicide and did not enjoy, maybe hated, visits from her mother. In one scene in the story, the mother visits. That afternoon my mother had brought me the roses. Save them for my funeral, Id said... But Esther, dont you remember what day it is today? No... Its your birthday. And that was when I had dumped the roses in the wastebasket. (Pg. 202-203) This was at her third institute she was transferred to. At this same institute, she met an old friend, Joan who she g...
