at point in their marriage where they needed to decide if love was enough for the two of them. Love was about all they had at this point. They were in serious financial trouble. The campaign had drained them of the majority of their assets. While at the lake, John and Kathy in their own way did their individual soul searching and evaluating of their lives. John gets the will power to put his life together and Kathy discovers missing one morning. John searches for her and finds the boat missing. The Raussman's, the neighbors, tell John not to worry. John finds the flowerpots broken. Where they just an accident? She left without a trace. A major search is underway. Vinnie and Lux, the authorities, question John. He is quite disturbed by their questions and becomes quite rattled. John call's Kathy's sister, Pat. She does not seem to trust John that he did not have anything to do with her disappearance. John continues to search but he is beginning to feel guilty for her absence. He refuses to believe or consider that she is dead. The search has manifested to a massive search. They find no boat, no body, and no evidence of what happened to Kathy. One is left to speculate. John's screams of "Kill Jesus" hints at his frustration in his spiritual life. He has a strong need to be in control. He refuses to believe that there is a higher power that justifies his life. John has serious unresolved feelings and issues about his father. John has never gotten over the loss of his father. His desire to kill seems to stem this. John is at times obsessed with the thoughts and ideas of killing. Did Kathy have a lover? It is possible and logical. Kathy wanted her "Dream Time". Deep down, Kathy wanted out of the life she had chosen. I think the following phrase from the novel summarizes Kathy's feelings: "She could not help believing in some fundamental governing principle beneath things." John Wade was a magician. He tried...
