marriage, she felt resentful of what she perceived as “an unwelcome, and uninvited dilemma.” Rudd had to make the conscious decision to look beyond outside influences, and her ideology, and thus finally leaned toward empathy and compassion. She soon came to realize that her husband had not chosen crossdressing either, and also felt pain. With this realization, Dr. Rudd was able to view crossdressers as a group of people who deserved respect and understanding.Despite the possibility of losing one’s spouse as a result of sharing this lifestyle, there are several cases, as in Dr. Rudd’s, where spouses not only accept cross-dressing and the associated behavior, but claim the relationship with the husband has grown more strong and connected upon learning of it. They believe the man can more relate with their feelings, and enjoy the feminine traits that may come about, such as compassion, tenderness and nurturing, often not expressed by men. Once the barrier of his secret life is lifted, a more open and honest relationship ensues. Some women not only accept crossdressing and the associated behavior but also seek out males having those needs and traits and actively participate in the “game”—sometimes with each partner reversing roles in both social and sexual situations.Many transvestites describe the longing to dress in a feminine way as the ultimate way to emulate and, thus, express their love and appreciation for women. They see themselves as a group of normally heterosexual men who admire and envy women so much that they greatly enjoy the opportunity to temporarily leave their everyday masculinity behind and “enter the fascinating world of femininity” (Prince, 1971) It is not unusual for the transvestite to use items of women’s apparel as aids for sexual gratification in the early stages of sexual awakening (Bullough, 1993). The apparel becomes a symbol of the longed for fe...
