c violence often becomes a pattern comprised of three stages. The phases vary in time and in severity between couples, and even at different times within the same relationship. It is, then, difficult to predict how long a couple will remain in one phase or to determine the length of an individual couple’s cycle. Phase 1 is the Tension-Building Phase, which constitutes criticism, yelling, swearing, and using angry gestures, coercion, and/or threats. Phase 2 is the Violence Phase, which is characterized by physical and sexual attacks and threats. Phase 3 is the Seduction Phase that is portrayed with apologies, blaming, promises to change, and gifts. It also explains how three dynamics — (1) love, (2) hope, and (3) fear -- keep the cycle in motion and make it difficult to end a violent relationship. For the sake of illustration, (1) Love for one’s partner: ‘the relationship has it’s good points, it’s not all bad”. (2) Hope that it will change: ‘the relationship didn’t begin like this’. (3) Fear that the threats to kill you or your family will become a reality. Sometimes the abuse does not stop with the victim. Children can suffer when one parent is abused by the other. Children are sometimes physically injured while the abuse is going on. They can be hit by something that is thrown, or be assaulted while trying to protect the battered. Children can be emotionally and physically neglected while the abuse is subsisting. Some of the emotional effects of domestic violence on children include: taking responsibility for the abuse, constant anxiety (that another beating will occur), guilt for not being able to stop the abuse or for loving the abuser, and fear of abandonment. Children of all ages are at risk for learning abusive behavior, and frequently show signs of aggression and/or withdrawal. Children in abusive homes worry about their own safety and the abused pare...
