g dual career relationships, resisting violence and abuse between intimates, and negotiating safer sex. The one that I will break down is managing dual career relationships. Managing dual career relationships is balancing by both partners the demands and pressures of two careers with investment in the relationship itself. Managing dual careers in relationships can be hampered by pseudolistening. Pseudolistening is pretending to listen. It is when we appear to be attentive, but our minds are really somewhere else. This can be very unhealthy for the relationship because when we pretend to listen but think of other things, we can miss some of the things that the other partner is saying and not hear or do the things that they want us to. It can cause problems when they have had a bad day and just need someone to listen to them, then when they ask you what you think and you have no answer, you get in trouble. It is also bad that if they ask you to pick something up for you and you don’t hear that, then you get into trouble for not listening to them or paying attention to what they are saying. Another bad form of listening is monopolizing. Monopolizing is the hogging of the stage by continuously focusing the communication on ourselves instead of the person who is talking. It is the old trick to turn the conversation around. It is used like you think you have it bad, well listen to all of my problems. It can be bad for relationships because both partners will almost start to argue over who had the worst day. It is almost an immature way to fight. Instead of venting your “steam” for the day, you can build more up in an argument with your partner. The last bad form of listening I will talk about is defensive listening. I am guilty of this one. Defensive listening is the perceiving personal attacks, criticisms, or hostile undertones in communication where none is intended. It can be bad for the dual career rela...
