tage 2 we brought Paula’s mother, Virginia, into the empty chair. Paula described her mother as a neatly kept, petite older woman who was extremely judgmental of others and quite opinionated. She also felt her mother was emotionally unavailable and not very affectionate. Paula also claimed that her mother would probably be a little annoyed about being in therapy. “Appearances are very important to her and we should appear to be the perfect family”, Paula said wryly. The dialogue began by Paula stating her dislike of her mother’s criticisms and how she wished her mother would be more supportive. When she switched chairs to respond, she claimed that these criticisms were meant to help her daughter improve herself. This type of exchange went on for a few minutes and proved to be uneventful. I sensed Paula was holding back some deeper feelings because she was not used to confronting her mother in this fashion. I asked Paula to say something to her mother that she always wanted to but never could. After thinking for few seconds she came up with “I hate you for making me feel so inadequate”. She was barely audible as she said this and I noticed she also looked down at the floor and gripped the arms of the chair tightly, indicating resistance. I brought these non-verbal cues to her attention and asked that she repeated her statement and back it up with the felt sentiment. She repeated it a couple of times with slightly more intensity, but she was still holding back. I then asked her to engage in an experiment and instructed her to take a thick pillow from the sofa, place it on her lap and pound it as she repeated the same line “I hate you for making me feel so inadequate”. There was significant increase in the intensity of her expression and by the third repetition, she began to cry. I offered her a tissue and asked that she switch so that Virginia (the mother) could respond, plus I...
