ep of self and/or a family. These seem to be goals that could be mutually satisfied but that is not always the case. If the employee's family increases and the volume of business decreases there will be a real conflict between these two goals. Sometimes, the only resolution is to sever the relationship but only after other options have been considered from all perspectives. I have learned an important lesson from this book which is fundamental for all relationships. Any relationship is consensual. All parties implicitly agree to work within some type of boundaries. These implied boundaries create the structure and the nature of the relationship. Any party to the relationship can upset this structure by behaving in a manner that does not fit their role. The roles are defined by the individual's power and position within the relationship. Even abusive, personal relationships have this arrangement, otherwise the relationship could not exist. Individuals within abusive relationships, have psychological and/or socio-economic reasons that prevent recognition of the nature of the relationship or they feel an inability to exist outside of it. The advice Mr. Carnegie relates in his book is helpful but either people have changed drastically or he was a truly naive person. His assumption is that an individual who respects his/her employer and has a desire to accommodate him/her, will make decisions logically, based on the mutual cost and benefits. This isn't always true. In fact, it probably isn't true half of the time. I am a manger for a local business and I have tried to use some of the advice from the book for problems which occur frequently. I have had some success using his advice. I have found no real support for his assumption that most people behave rationally or use logic as a tool for decision making. For example, absenteeism is a major problem. I have an employee that worked part-time. She supports herself and one child. She was callin...
